Living LIFE's Difficulties
JOINING ME in this journey is,..
- Witty and funny according to himself, but actually he is a real jerk sometimes especially when he's with close friends. Alfie or also known as PINGGOT, is currently residing in Rego Park, New York and working in Best Western. He came from a failed marriage but is blessed with two sons and a daughter. Being the father who should provide, he's constrained to stay in the US for a job opportunity.
He is single but not available... saving his love for that someone whom he considered LOVE of his life. Quite complicated relationship... nevertheless, hopeful that GOD will hear his heart's desire for a lifetime partner. Being alone, away from his loved ones is the saddest part of his journey through life and trying to earn decent income to support and provide his children the best education is the main reason why he had to work overseas. He wants to have financial stability.
These are his sentiments when homesickness prevails and lonesome fills his heart....
"I often look back and ask myself a lot of WHAT IFs?
What if I chose to pursue my studies in UP? What if I grew up with my real parents? What if I did not marry just because I got someone pregnant? What if I was not born with a silver spoon in my mouth?
Would I have the same challenges I am having right now? Would I be more of a successful person? Would I still be happily married and have an almost perfect family?
But we all know that past is past and can never be changed but only be cherished or forgotten. We have to live life today and make the most out of it.
I always view life to be imperfect... full of uncertainties and tribulations but every time I wake up... I am thankful to the Lord for another morning HE has offered me. I really don't know where this negative feelings are coming from... Maybe, I'm just sad to be alone.
During my younger days, I used to be a " happy go lucky type of person" I used to live life on a daily basis, wondering what it would bring me.
I guess for now, I am doing this sacrifice for my children and the LOVE of my life... ( I hope she's reading this). I want to make sure that before I get back home, life will be easier... that by the time I decided to stay for good, I probably have set aside something for my children's future or may have given them the education they deserve... that I may be financially secured to comfortably live with my future partner in life.
It was not an easy decision though. As I have to be physically away from those I love the most. Never a time came that I don't think of them. I actually don't blame anyone except myself. Those "what if's" will never help me in any way so, I have to be strong-willed to overcome these difficulties.
My children: Paolo Miguel, Luisa Joyce and Alfonso Gabriel
Whatever future may bring me, I'll be held responsible now because I have all the time to prove my worth as a person and be better if not the best. The distasteful past is behind me. I may be hurt and felt abandoned but those adversities somehow mold my present and will definitely guide my future. My faith will lead me to the righteous path and I am looking forward to a brighter tomorrow.
With the LOVE of my life